Be specific

When two people are together, miscommunication happens. It’s like one of the features of a packaged deal that you don’t want, but you can’t do anything about it. It’s a packaged deal, so you have to accept it as it is.

However, it is not all doom and gloom. Though it is present in any relationship, we can take precautionary steps to minimize any damage by being aware of it at all times and prevent it by improving our communication skills.

One thing to keep in mind when communicating is to be specific when you are trying to say something. Often times we say things with the assumption that the person simply knows what we mean. Although in our head it makes sense, it doesn’t necessarily translate in the exact same way in the other person’s head.

So we need to be wary of how the other person is perceiving what we say and we need to make it clear off the bat. Of course, things don’t always go that way and miscommunications can still happen. But even so, this realization can still help with the damage control work.

Case in point, yesterday I wanted to take my little brother out to see a movie. I mentioned that the movie started at 4:35pm and I will pick him up after Zohor. In my head, I thought he would understand that “after Zohor” doesn’t mean literally after Zohor since the movie starts later at 4:35pm. In my head, I was thinking of fetching him at 3pm.

Understandably, he ended up waiting for me since 1:20pm (exactly after Zohor) and I felt bad. Although in my head I was like, “Didn’t I tell you that the movie starts at 4:35pm?!”, I knew that it was my fault for not being specific when I say “after Zohor”.

It’s a small thing, but it does make a difference in a relationship. Often times it’s the small things that matter, because it shows how much you pay attention.