Showing posts from August, 2016

Noob Husband (Year 3) - When Two Becomes One

This year will be my 3rd year of being married to the woman I love.

I had a deep problem that was bothering me, and I decided to keep it to myself. But somewhere in my mind, I knew that I shouldn't do that and I should express it to someone - especially someone really close, like my wife. I knew it, but I forgot.

Today, I was reminded of it.

When you find yourself a spouse, you are creating a team. In a team, we look out for each other. There is not such thing as winning without the other member of the team on board. When one member wins, the other wins too. When one member loses, the other loses too.

When you are on the same boat, there is no competition. You have the same goal: to keep the boat afloat and to reach your destination. If the boat sinks, it takes everybody with it. That is the analogy that I have to keep reminding myself in this marital relationship I am in.

For a while now, I have been contemplating on some financial matters. I have to make a financial decision th…

Confidence, English Speaking, and Malaysian Students

Confidence (or self-confidence) is one of those topics that I love to learn more about. One of the reasons why I love it because I see a need for it today. Many people, especially young people, whom I've interacted with on some level have self-confidence issues.

It is one of those things that you realize after much exposure, like a pattern. Perhaps you are the only one who notice it because you are paying attention to it. Perhaps you attract certain people with certain problems. Whatever it is, I see it happening enough times to draw a safe conclusion that many young people have a confidence problem and it needs to be addressed.

In many cases, people think that confidence is something that you get from the outside: from the clothes you wear, to the people you hang out with, to the jewelries you have on, to the cars you can (or can't) afford to buy, and to the skills that you have.

Undeniably, one can feel more confident by having those external things. But the confidence is t…

One Thing I Learned From The "Evil" Western Culture

When I hear people say, "The western culture is poisoning our minds!" or something else along the same line, I want to ask them, "Have you ever been to a western country before?" My experience in Canada (a western country) seems different than the rhetoric I usually hear back home.

Perhaps what people say has some truth in it, but it is not the whole truth.

Undeniably, every culture has a good side and a bad side. My culture has it, and western culture has it too. But to generalize an entire culture and label it as "evil" just because you see a few negatives in it, is unjust.

We don't want people to call our culture "evil". But then, we are comfortable calling other culture "evil"? Perhaps The Golden Rule needs more repetition: Do unto others what you want others to do unto you.

I have learned a lot of beautiful practices from my time in a western country. Many of these beautiful practices I find to be Islamic, even though the peo…

Interview Tip: Just Be You, The Confident You

I applied for a spot in an international leadership program and I was shortlisted for an interview in KL. So a few days ago, I flew there for an interview I haven't had in a while. Prior to the interview, I was anxious.

From my secondary school years, I was taught to "study" for the interview. So my anxiety has brought me back to my secondary school days and I had a passing thought telling me that I should study.

I find it weird to study for an interview: to anticipate the questions, and to prepare/memorize answers beforehand. Even a simple question such as "Tell us about yourself" is rehearsed. I thought to myself, "If I was the interviewer, do I want that in a candidate?" I would imagine that an interviewer would want to see the real me. At least, that is what I would want if I was the interviewer.

So I didn't study. It's an interview. Not an exam.

Anxiety is still there. But I managed to control it, even while waiting for my turn outside of…