Tuesday, April 07, 2015

Notes From Books: Simplicity Parenting (Chapter Two)


Chapter Two: Soul Fever

1. The author used the term "soul fever" to illustrate the imbalance state of the child's mental and emotional wellbeing. The author explained the concept and the healing approach to soul fever by giving an analogy of a typical physical fever.

2. When our child experiences physical fever, we go through a process to facilitate healing. We notice the illness, we stop our normal routine, we focus more on the ill child, and we provide the child with the most conducive environment for healing to take place.

3. The author noted that we are not causing any healing. We are just providing the child with an atmosphere of support and allowing the child the time and the space needed for the healing process to take place.

4. This is very similar to a soul fever. Once the fever kicks in, our parental instincts can detect something is wrong. Noticing is the first step and it is an important one. It shows the child that you care. One of the worst things to do to an ill child is failure to acknowledge the illness. A simple question such as "is everything okay?" is enough to indicate that you are paying attention.

5. After noticing, we stop our normal routine. The atmosphere of the house changes (or rather, should change) towards an atmosphere of healing and more attention is given to the child. This is more difficult than anything else; to give more attention. Because this requires that you, as the parent, sacrifices more time and energy towards your child. With our constantly preoccupied lifestyle, it is difficult to make the switch. This is where our priorities will be greatly tested. What is more important to you will manifest itself in this heat of the moment. Which is more important: work or family?

6. We give more time and energy towards catering for what the child needs to break this soul fever. It might take a short time, it might take a long time. No two soul fever is the same. Much like physical fever; some take longer time to heal than others. We try our best to provide the child with the right, conducive environment for healing to take place. Perhaps our current motion of life is too much for the child and he/she just needs a break. A short family holiday over the weekend works wonders. Though it is not a magic pill which can solve everything, but it is still a good thing to do in the healing process. Might be good for the parents too.

7. Once the fever breaks, do we return to our normal routine exactly like before? It depends. With any fever, we should identify what causes it and we should learn not to repeat the same mistakes once the fever is over. We don't want to throw our child into a physical fever again, right? Same goes for a soul fever. Some things need to change. A child's soul fever might be an indication that there is something wrong with our family's current lifestyle. It is a red flag that we need to pay attention to, seek the causes, apply the remedies, and change our ways to a better lifestyle. But in any case, a successful recovery from this soul fever will make the child stronger emotionally and psychologically.
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Aiman Azlan
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